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Get the most bang for your f*ck.

Kylie Lip Kit prolly stays put because you put so much damn effort into putting it on right.

“I went over to suck my FWB off. Even after the 30-minute-long blow job that got pretty messy, it was still in place! No need to reapply before I left. No one could tell that I was just sucking the life out of some guy.”
—Anonymous

Get it from KYLIE Cosmetics from $27-$29. Available in Velvet or Matte in multiple shades.

KYLIE Cosmetics / Via kyliecosmetics.com

Anastasia Beverly Hills DIPBROW Pomade to help you avoid that awkward post-coital convo about where the hell your eyebrows went.

“Let me tell y'all. I was getting screwed mercilessly by not one, but TWO guys in a session that lasted a little over three hours, spanning several vehicles and rooms of the house on a steamy 76 degree night. And my eyebrows were STILL on fleek!!! My face was getting shoved into pillows, sofa arms, and body parts, and somehow I made it out alive with both eyebrows still intact. Mind you I hadn't reapplied since the morning and this all went down late at night.”
—Anonymous

Get it from Amazon, starting at $23.78. Available in 10 shades.

@anastasiabeverlyhills / Via instagram.com

Too Faced Better Than Sex Mascara apparently DOES live up to its super cocky name.

“My boyfriend and I took a really nice weekend trip to Florida for our anniversary. After a super fancy (and very humid) dinner outdoors, we went back to the hotel room unusually early. Turns out he was planning for us to have sex for HOURS. I first put the mascara on around 2:00 P.M. that day, and it held up through a solid three rounds of rough sex with a lot of kissing and sweating. All my other makeup was ruined, but my lashes still looked BOMB afterwards. This waterproof mascara works wonders.”
—Anonymous

Get it at Amazon for $22.

@toofaced / Via instagram.com

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