“What day is it?”, “Time to get up” or “It’s your turn to cook breakfast” are not good ways to start the morning when it is Valentine’s Day. On Valentine’s Day you need to think about a way that you can add romance to your conversations with your wife or girlfriend all-day-long.

One guru that I was speaking to recently told me that he tells men that Valentine’s Day is the time to buy your wife flowers, chocolates and a personal gift. Yes, that would be nice, but all men are not made of money and there are practical implications to spending money when it is needed elsewhere. So, whether or not you decide to buy her a lot of presents, I want to tell you about how to speak and act on this special day.

Whether you are 24 years old or 69 years old or any other age it is important to remember that your wife just wants to be the most important person in your life and she wants to hear you tell her that in numerous ways.

When you open your eyes in the morning, you can start with something sincere about how you feel about her. You can preface it by saying – “Today is Valentine’s Day and I know it is an important day for those of us in love.” And then you could go on to say “I just wanted you to know how much I love you.” Or “and so today I’m going to spend it making you happy.” Or “and I just want you to know that I think you are the #1 wife and mother in the whole wide world!” It’s important that what you say is what you mean and that you say it in your own words. You don’t want your wife or girlfriend saying “Did you read how to do this on the internet?” The sentiments that you speak must be your sentiments. I am only here to give you a guide and ideas about what you can tell her.

Jeannie tells this story: “My husband isn’t a very talkative man and he has always told me that I am the romantic one in the family and I’m in charge of saying romantic things. So we devised a little dialogue that we can use. I say “Say something romantic” and he says “You have great legs”. And then we laugh.” What I like about it is that they helped create the dialogue and that it is their personal little game that is only between them. Having special songs, jokes, dialogues, secrets between each other that are meant just for the two of you adds intimacy and specialness – not to mention – romance to your relationship.

You don’t have to be fancy! Simple words are great. Quoting Browning with “How do I love thee, Let me count the ways” is nice but quoting poetry isn’t mandatory! Your own words are can be just as meaningful.

“I love you honey” goes along way when it just pops out every so often. Men who live by the slogan “I told you when I married you that I loved you and if I change my mind I’ll let you know” don’t have a long shelf life as a husband or boyfriend! Don’t be afraid to tell your wife how you feel about her.

Other things that you can compliment her on include not only the way she looks but how she acts. “I really liked how you dealt with the kids this morning at breakfast. You have a really good way with children – I’m so lucky to have you as the mother of my children.” Appreciation goes a long way in any relationship. Being appreciative is another way to be romantic especially if you include a kiss with the positive statement.

And just before you close your eyes on Valentine’s night, remember to end the day with a romantic word or two. “You are so beautiful and I’m so proud to be your husband.” or “That was a great day we had together, I’m so lucky to have you for a wife and best friend.” “Good night, darling!”