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Champagne in your mouth > some weirdo’s tongue.
This year took Prince, Muhammad Ali, Florence Henderson, David Bowie, Alan Rickman, Sharon Jones, Leonard Cohen, Phife Dawg, and facts, among other things.
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But before you trek in your sparkly dress and practical, look-ruining snow boots to your New Year's party of choice, I implore you to reexamine the tradition of midnight makeouts.
HBO
The pressure to play tonsil hockey alongside cute couples at midnight on January 1 is real; I'll give you that. If you don't want to start 2017 with a reminder of how single you are, I really, truly feel you.
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Does that seem preferable to an acknowledgement that you, single you, just made it through one of the worst years in memory by 👏 your 👏 damn 👏 self 👏 ? That shit is an accomplishment, not a failure. Be proud! You have Xena, Warrior Princessed the fuck out of 2016.
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