One of the hardest things about male chastity is actually getting your man to stop himself from cumming.

John, my husband and I, have found a simple way to do this. First comes the strategy, and then there is are specific tactics within the strategy.

The strategy is easy: he’s found it’s easier for him not to have an orgasm when he imagines it as a ‘cliff’ he’s going to go over.

And once he knows where that ‘edge’ is, then it’s much easier to back away from it (obviously); but it’s also easier then to avoid with subsequent edging. That’s the really important thing because it means we can make love and play for a long time without having to worry about him being too excited to carry on without having an orgasm.

The trick (he says) is knowing how to find the edge, recognise it when it’s approaching and not go flying over it in his enthusiasm.

So now we come to the orgasm denial tactics.

Remember: the point of ‘no return’ is the edge.

So as he’s approaching it he mentally maps his orgasm and how far he is from it onto a path to the edge of the cliff. He literally sees this path in his mind’s eye and imagines himself walking along it.

Now, if you’re going to ask me exactly how he does this, I can’t answer because I’m not in his head. But this is how he describes it to me and I can say two things for sure:

1. It takes practice. And you’re better erring on the side of ‘safety’.
2. It works. The chances of John cumming when he’s not supposed to are vanishingly small now. This is A Good Thing, for two reasons: first, we can have a lot more fun and do more things without worrying; and secondly, it makes my teasing of him much more worthwhile because I can push him further.

By working as a team it’s possible for me to take him to that edge and back over and over again before calling it a day.

And like anything, the more you do it, the better at it you’re going to get.

Don’t make the mistake of thinking all or even most of the fun of chastity is to be found in tease and denial, because if you’re not serving her desires and worshipping her body then you’re missing out on some of the most exquisite torture you can imagine. My favourite rapidly became the strapon — almost as good as the real thing and certainly good enough for long term orgasm denial.

Bottom line: your man does not need to orgasm.

He may want to, and there are reasons you might sometimes allow it (and some fiendish ways of doing it for him), but when it comes down to it he doesn’t need to orgasm, ever.

This is what John and I are aiming for, and we’re both extremely excited about the whole thing. No date yet, but we’re closing in on a few probables.